By Bilesanmi Abayomi
Gbenga Adewale , a Nigerian now based in the United Kingdom, emphasized the importance of building strong, enduring friendships that surpass romantic relationships. Speaking with KosofePost last weekend in Cheshire East, UK, Gbenga reflected on an incident involving a close friend in Nigeria, who turned him down during a time of need.
Gbenga shared that before leaving Nigeria, he reached out to his friend, requesting a loan of ₦500,000 without revealing the purpose, only to be declined due to economic challenges. In a surprising twist, Gbenga later learned that his friend had given his girlfriend ₦300,000, prompting the girlfriend to pressure him for the remaining balance. This revelation led to a fallout between the friends.
Rather than plead with his friend, Gbenga reacted with disappointment, questioning the strength of a friendship that could be sacrificed over a romantic relationship. His friend’s wife even stepped in to mediate, sensing the strain between the two men.
A year after Gbenga relocated to the UK, the same friend contacted him, seeking financial help after his business failed. Reflecting on the situation, Gbenga highlighted that true, lasting friendships weather difficulties, unlike many romantic relationships that, in his view, are often focused on short-term gains.
Through his experience, Gbenga urged people to value and empower friendships beyond the confines of romance, stressing that in times of hardship, a genuine friend is more likely to stand by your side.
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Matter on deeper friendship is beyond the ways we see it, it’s about trust , sincerity of purpose without any projected value as a short and in long terms. Show me your friend so that the society can place premium on your personality . Friendship has its various benefits, we can’t rule out skirmishes, we May digest the below benefits ascribed to friendship.
Deeper friendships offer numerous benefits, including-
Emotional Benefits:
1. Increased trust and loyalty
2. Emotional support and stability
3. Sense of belonging and connection
4. Improved mental health and well-being
5. Reduced stress and anxiety
Personal Growth:
1. Self-discovery and self-awareness
2. Learning from each other’s experiences
3. Personal growth and development
4. Expanded perspectives and worldviews
5. Improved communication skills
Social Benefits:-
1. Stronger social network and community
2. Increased social support and connection
3. Shared activities and experiences
4. Mutual encouragement and motivation
5. Social validation and acceptance
Practical Benefits:-
1. Practical help and support (e.g., moving, childcare)
2. Shared resources and expertise
3. Networking opportunities
4. Access to new experiences and knowledge
5. Financial support (e.g., lending, borrowing)
Spiritual Benefits:-
1. Deeper sense of purpose and meaning
2. Spiritual growth and exploration
3. Shared values and principles
4. Increased empathy and compassion
5. Sense of transcendence and connection
Long-term Benefits:-
1. Lifelong relationships
2. Shared memories and history
3. Increased sense of security and stability
4. Better coping mechanisms for life challenges
5. Legacy and impact on each other’s lives
Other relevant Benefits-
1. Improved physical health (e.g., lower blood pressure)
2. Increased happiness and life satisfaction
3. Better conflict resolution skills
4. Enhanced creativity and problem-solving
5. Sense of accountability and motivation
deeper friendships can lead to a richer, more fulfilling life, providing emotional, personal, social, and practical benefits that can last a lifetime.
Aptly, deeper relationships should be encouraged among ourselves, children, communities and other relevant individuals , we have seen where relationships have taken people to , like I said earlier, we can’t escape skirmishes because we have trusted so many into sorrow, deeper relationships are still producing good outcomes regardless of changes in social landscapes due to social and economic factors, ( Omoba Awofeso Rasheed Ololade)